Fate vs. Faith

What exactly does life have in store for us? Are we on a pre-determined path? Are we just in the proverbial cable car of life? Do we really have a say in what happens or where we end up?

Some people believe that God/fate/the universe has a place for us and we need to find our place there and recognize the opportunities to go down this path.

To me this violates my free will. Why don't I get to choose my life path? Why don't I get to choose what will make me happy? That is my ultimate goal in this life, to be happy. To say that there is something, some force that is driving me toward a specific set of circumstances sounds like a dog owner training its dog to not do its business in the house. "Don't do that...do this. Don't go there, go here."

Any decision you make, should not be made hastily. Weighing the pros and cons. What good will come of it? Will the good outweigh the bad? What are the future repercussions of said decision?

At this point some of you may be thinking, "Travis, what about God's plan for you?"

It is a true that I am a God-fearing man, and I seek out his will in my life for ultimate happiness therein and the life to come.

"Whoa whoa whoa!" you say, "God's will, what about the control you want for you life?"

It is absolutely there. If you are striving to live as holy of a life as you can, seeking out the things that will make you happy, then you can't make a wrong decision.

As of late, I have been considering several possibilities about what to do with the next several years of my life. I have considered three different Catholic volunteer programs, moving to several different places, big cities and small towns alike. To think that God wants me in one place above another, doesn't make any sense to me. Will God not bless me if I choose Chicago over Monett, or DC over St. Louis? I abhor the thought! That doesn't sound like a fair and just God to me.

God's will is for me to be happy. Look to the scriptures for that. John 10:10 "A thief comes only to steal and slaughter and destroy; I came so that they might have life and have it to the full."

A full life with a pre-determined destination...doesn't sound like the kid of life I want to live

Weekend Revelation

So I have been doing a lot of thinking lately about what exactly I am going to do with the next several years of my life, because around August is when it wall come to a head and if one hasn't already been made, it will be decision time. I have had it told to me that depending on where I am my ideas about what I want to do with my life changes. And I agree with that statement. If I am back home in Monett, living there would be cool, working or having my own land with cattle and such. When I travel to a bigger city (STL, KC, DC) that life is very appealing as well. When I am in Springfield I think more about volunteering in the various programs I have applied for. About the only thing my brain can agree with itself on is that wherever life leads me, it will be away from Springfield. 9_9

(ps. thats an exhausted smiley face, notice the bags under the eyes)

I just got back from a trip to STL, literally like less than an hour ago, and I had a lot of time during the weekend and on the drive home to work through my situations as objectively as I could. I want to do something that I enjoy, working with people my own age, with similar ideas to my own while still having the freedom to have my own ideas, I don't want to go backwards financially, I don't want to miss opportunities anywhere.

Opportunities...theres a bit I could talk about. I have been told to examine my choices in life thus far, because I may miss opportunities somewhere else. But isn't every decision you make cutting off possible opportunities? You take one hoping it will pan out and perhaps present you with equal if not better opportunities in other circumstances. So its pretty much a leap of faith for me. Forgoing one opportunity to take advantage of another.

One of the things I have come to learn about myself is that I cannot make decisions aimed at pleasing the most number of people. I need to make my own decisions while listening to and respecting the opinions of my friends and family